Saturday, April 16, 2011

What are you afraid of?

Pin It First of all, I'd like to share with my faithful readers that I am now just "overweight".  Sad to be excited about this, but hey, I'll take what I can get!  Next stop..."normal".  Will I ever be normal I wonder?  Loaded question, I know! 

This week on the Biggest Loser seemed to have a theme of facing your fears.  Two people on the show (a trainer and a contestant) had desperate fears of heights, yet they faced their fears and jumped off of the tallest building in the southern hemisphere (in New Zealand)!!  Amazing.  I was so happy for them that I cried!  Throughout the show some of the contestants talked about fears they had (fear of exercising being one) and it got me thinking...what am I afraid of?  I guess when I think about it, I have lots of little fears.  Part of me is afraid to get to my goal weight...what if I can't maintain it?  What if I gain weight and let everyone down?  The logical part of me knows that people will not (I hope!) feel any differently about me if I did gain weight, but a big part of me doesn't want to look like a failure.  I hate to disappoint people and I know if I can't maintain my loss, people will be disappointed (nobody more than me!)  I am afraid of roller coasters too.  I'm not sure if I'm afraid of them because I fear I might break the ride (yes, even now I feel like I may break things by sitting on/in them) or if it's a fear of heights (I had no problem going up in the Empire State Building and looking down) or if it's a fear of not being in control.  I think that the control issue has a lot to do with it. 

So there you have it.  Some of my fears.  I know I have more that are tied to my weight and I am going to be doing some deep thinking to see if I can figure them out and conquer them one at a time.  I would love to do something really risky once I lose my weight that I would never have done before...I'd love to try hang gliding or zip lining...part of what has kept me from trying these in the past was that you had to tell them your weight...and if you may DIE!  So I chose not to go :-)  Maybe the next time the opportunity presents itself, I'll just go for it!

Oh, I signed up to do the 2011 CIBC Run for the Cure which is taking place on Sunday, October 2, 2011.  I am hoping to be able to run a good part of it this year (last year I walked it all, no running).  I realized today that that weekend will be my two year Weight Watchers anniversary, so it would be nice to be able to run by then...I hope and pray that I'm at my goal weight by then too!!!

Off to face the day...busy day ahead of me.  Happy Saturday everyone!


DLandHFX said...

Scorpions ;) And being in really really deep water (like out at sea).

Marilee said...

Dear Normal, That sure sounds fantastic to me! Hooray for getting to normal!

Tanya said...

lol, not normal yet Marilee!! But thanks :-)

Dean - I don't like deep water where I'm not quite sure where it ends! And not a fan of scorpions...or snakes :-)

Shondi said...

Yay for being overweight! :-) You go, girl!

Tanya said...

lol, thanks!!